I’ve been working on a resolution for New Years but I’m running a bit behind. I try to think of something ever year that I can keep close to my heart and to my head and use as a measure, a yardstick or just some form of inspiration in general for the year ahead. This year I am struggling. Everything just seems trite. In the past I have focussed on simple things, or simple sayings like ‘Be a better friend’, ‘Do good’, ‘Smell the roses’, ‘To thine own self be true’, ‘Say yes to life’ – Last year was ‘Say no.’ because I found I had too much on my plate with running my own business and working contract work at the same time and a very wise friend once shared with me that “if you can’t do a job to your standards, then don’t do it,” (thanks Steve Gray). All I have so far this year is ‘Do more with less’ and that is not exactly inspiring. I want something that has a little more meat too it. Some depth of meaning and something that gets me going on my ‘meh’ days.

For example Prince in his song ‘Let’s go Crazy’ has this insanely fantastic line where he says “…Lets look for the purple banana before they put us in the truck – let’s go!”. Admittedly he may have been seeing purple bananas at that time in his life – I will never know – however how I interpret that line of that song is that it is saying: Don’t settle, don’t get comfortable – seek the different, seek the new. Travel that road less travelled, forge your own way.  Because if there is a purple banana, you won’t find it unless you go looking for it. And importanlty do it now ‘Before they put us in the truck’ – well  for me that bit is simple to interpret – Prince is saying do it now – before you die, before they come grab your empty carcass and haul your bones away. (side note – I ADORE Prince. I think he is an incredible artist and a true inspiration in Purple. Saw him in concert in 2012. Rocked my mind.)

Fast forward a sleep on this topic and a great motorcycle ride in the sun and I think I have it. Today we rode between Motueka and Picton. The road was gorgeous, the scenery ever changing and I saw some fantastic sights that will stay with me forever. The road itself have lovely slalom-like corners (they are called ‘twisties) and mesmerising views of the sounds (we took the scenic route). While on the road my thoughts were filled with memories of a friend we lost in late 2013. We spent Boxing Day to New Year’s Day with him last year and we both feel his loss everyday. We lost him suddenly and unexpectedly. Also I should explain that when I say we lost him, we didn’t simply put him down and forget where we had put him, nothing that temporary sadly. He died. Much more permanent. So I’m on the back of the bike and I’m missing my friend – but thinking about good times we shared and feeling glad to have known him and for us to have shared our lives and done all the crazy ass things we did together. But mostly I am just missing him and feeling a bit sorry for myself that my journey continues on without him in it. (Here is a motorcycling tip for the uninitiated: it is really silly to cry on a motorcycle because you can’t dry your tears or blow your nose at 100kms an hour because taking off your helmet or even simply opening your visor us problematic – so I don’t recommend it at all).

Then I begin to think about how grateful I am to have woken up this morning, to have one last day of holiday to squeeze the very last drops of rest, relaxation and adventure out of. My friend didn’t wake up one day. It was that simple, and here I am waking up for another gorgeous 24 hours of life. It occurred to me that today is a blessing and that in fact each and every day that I wake up is a blessing. I used to know this more fully. Somehow I have begin to forget it. (I tend up forget really simple truths like that). So simply put “Today is a blessing. Make the most of it.”

This year I vow to waste less time thinking about myself and more time thinking about my Self. Less time worring about crap I can’t control, change, fix and more time dreaming, living my dreams and living in and from joy!

I’m going to be less selfish more self centred. (and by self centred I mean getting to the very centre,  the very core of me, of who I am, of my self) How do I want to be? What do I want to do? and what do I want to have?

Be, Do, Have?

Then answer to that question came through a conversation with Husband #2 who lives in London with his very own Husband. He is focussing his 2014 on two words: quality and simplicity. I was inspired by that idea. Add the missing element that I adore in life: Fun – and I am sold!

I want to be, do and have all of those things, experiences and ways of being. That is what I want for 2014. Easy.

Now I just need to remember.

I think a 24 carat gold banana photo will help with that.